I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
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