Well apparently he's into motor boating.
How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
I just looked at my iPhone gps history... "the gas station", "the park with a big scary fence", "the trampoline", and, my favorite, "where we were when we were about to do lines off a bible".
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
Randomize
