Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
in your professional opinion, what's the most elegant way of saying "sorry I spent all night flirting with you, I thought you were gay" ?
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
Randomize
