just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
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