too bad you live with your parents still
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
So I guess I walked across campus with "pat my ass" in sharpie on my forehead.
You deserve it, you colossal cock block.
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