You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
You are the funniest drunk Jew I know. Never in my life have I witnessed someone respond, "Is your dick kosher?" while being picked-up on.
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
The girl in line in front of me at the grocery store is buying wine, m&m minis, a toothbrush, and condoms. Is it inappropriate to high-five her?
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
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