So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
I was greeting people at my door feeding them jello shots out of an ice cube tray with a spoon.
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
Based off of the soaking wet clothes/towels/rugs, Eiffel Tower statue and monkey in the bathtub, I'm going to assume drunk me took a bath.
Are you really alive right now?
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
Randomize
