hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
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