He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
Randomize
