Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
Randomize
