youre lurking in front of me
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
I'M CUDDLING WITH MY CAT AND THAT GUY SENT ME A DICK PIC. UNANNOUNCED DICK PICS ARE TERRIFYING AND MY CAT WILL NEVER BE THE SAME
Executive order 941: BRING ME THE FINEST PANCAKES!
You have got to stop watching the West Wing before going out.
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
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