Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
Randomize
