I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
Dislocated my knee during sex, popped it back in and kept going. Then got simpathy chipotle out of it too.
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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