I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
he stole me 6 pairs of frilly undies and proclaimed "your ass looks like a 5 in those. it'll be a 10 in these bad boys". every girl needs a gay bff.
Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
You owe me a new pair of headphones. You plugged mine into the top of a mustard bottle.
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
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