So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
Sockward: that moment during sexytimes when you realize your socks are still on and you have no idea how to remove them in a non-awkward fashion.
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
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