I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
You couldn't remember her number so you tried to dial her name into your phone. Once you realized you didn't know her name, you dialed 7 random numbers
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
Randomize