so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
You made a "martini" bagel. Took a bagel dunked it in vodka and put olives in it
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize
