ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
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