I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
Side Note: Everyone in my office is getting engaged and having baby showers. And I'm all like, fuck your joy, I just want more string cheese in my life.
I'm at the gym. I've taken enough caffeine to feel inspired to be a low budget instagram fitness model. I totally forgot my push up bra though
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
Randomize
