i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
Never again will I go to my mom's side of the family's parties. After the bride and groom cut the head off the roasted pig together they boarded their RV and rode off into the sunset.
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
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