Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
Sober January is a disaster.
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
Randomize
