Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
My office already closed tomorrow. I'm bout to get drunk and build a muh fuckin fort. I shall call it "Fort Fuck You, Sandy, You Fuckin Bitch"
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
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