but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
Nothing like ripping open the box with your keys on a sat R train and throwing back the morning after pill with some coconut water on my way to work at a fitness studio for free
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
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