I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
Look, all I'm sayin is $2 boilermakers and an expense account are probably a bad mix…
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
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