Lesson learned: don't hide your vodka in your little brothers toy box.
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
I woke up with $100 in my pocket and I was so excited until I found an atm receipt for a $500 withdrawal. Not as exciting.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
Randomize
