I think scott just propositioned me for sex
dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
Randomize
