i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
I just woke up, dressed as Chris Brown, with a bunless hot dog (presumably from 7/11) in my pocket, wearing a pair of shoes I don't recognize as my own. Help.
Randomize
