did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
Randomize