I figured girls wouldn't be down to sleep w/ a guy who plugged a pregnant chick
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
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