he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
Everything about him screamed your future.
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
the cop didnt laugh with me when he patted me down and pulled out my flask.
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize
