So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
You were so drunk that you were trying to take pictures of a MILF at the park so you could send them to Adam, but you didn't want to "seem creepy," so you used taking pictures of her son as a cover. Needless to say, cops were called.
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
my mind is a poorly written porno when i'm drunk.
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
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