he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
Fuckin' raining men in my bedroom while I'm trying to drunk eat a rather large portion of pasta. Like shoo I already picked who I'm sleeping with. Pasta wins.
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
Randomize
