How do I say to her "Have you eaten mango lately because my penis had an allergic reaction"
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
Randomize
