You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
He was sucking on my finger.... and it was at that moment that I thought: Man. I wish I had a penis.
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
Note to self: don't tell your girlfriends dad you can have his daughter in bed by ten and home by midnight. He doesnt find it funny
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
Randomize