something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
I have fence marks all over my body
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
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