I just saw a hobo shake a payphone until it spat out a bunch of quarters. what a champ.
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
Randomize