Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
My neighbor is burning all of her ex's things in a metal drum outside the window. Guess who's going to make a new friend?
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Randomize
