It's true. Ladies love me because I'm so strong and they feel safe. Not because of my pseudo charm and their impaired judgement after several drinks...
upper decked the toilet at the restaurant that wouldn't let me pee there yesterday
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
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