dude i'm inner monologue high
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
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