I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
Just drove through Taco Johns wearing a drug rug and no pants. When I rolled down my window, the girl paused for a minute before saying "um... 4.07"
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
To the woman who just heard me unscrew my flask in the Denny's women's bathroom at 10am: discretion isn't required but greatly appreciated.
Did you at least share?
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