You made me cry and you don't even care
I feel like I'm in dance class right now
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
Hey cutie is the game almost over? I'm making dinner for us it'll be ready soon. Xox
You would rather make fucking dinner than watch a hockey game that rivals the epic-ness of miracle, the one of the biggest upsets in sport history? Babe I don't know if I can date a girl with such terrible priorities.
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
Randomize
