I hope mine doesn't look like that
maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
Even my vagina gasped.
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
Randomize
