I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
So bottomless mimosas = me waking up in a truck bed in a random neighborhood with no purse or phone or idea how I got there.
Randomize
