Heybabeimwearingurpanties
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
$5 long island pitchers = roommate pissing on his laptop at 3am.
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
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