at 4 in the morning i heated a family sized mac n cheese for a minute and decided to eat it frozen cuz I didn't wanna wait for that long
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
i think the bruises are from the grocery store. on separate occasions. i've been spending a lot of time drunk at the market lately.
i have a vague recollection of being in the parking deck around 4 this morning, and on monday morning i was naked on the roof.
that would mean it's on tape
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
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