dude i'm inner monologue high
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
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