so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
Just saw my boss eat a banana in three bites.
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
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