So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
He's coming back with me for the week. It took me saying "I don't wanna drive myself home... I'm better as a passenger giving road head" for him to jump at it. Rack another one up for my magical openings.
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
Can you pick up from work today? There's a surprise for you on the bed and I haven't gone blind which is positive.
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
Randomize
