Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
You should probably wake up already as I have yet another story for you. Teaser? Blood from knife wound. Tequila. Guitar hero. Kitchen counter. Lawyer.
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
I have fence marks all over my body
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
Randomize
