just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
your like the ambassador to my penis.
Jen gave my number to some guy she met in NY. He sent me a picture of his weiner. He had nice shoes. I replied with a pic of bacon.
When in doubt always reply with bacon.
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
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