Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
I'm terrified that I'm going to have a baby with a guy who posts snapchat stories while ignoring my texts
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
Randomize
